Dan,
What version of Windows? 98 should use file:///C:/WINDOWS/CALC.EXE but my 2K uses file:///C:/WINNT/System32/CALC.EXE.
What about a MAC or a flavor of LINUX/UNIX?
It might just be better to use a script.
Squash,
Welcome to the forums. You could open a ticket and see if our techs are having trouble connecting to your account or you can run a traceroute and see if that might give an indication of a routing problem.